to lose a dream
to lose a love
to lose a feeling
they all have their distinct quality. they all leave the same distinct feelings.
these are the worst feelings of all because in these emotions we can feel centuries of pain. the ugly ducklings of the emotional spectrum. nobody loves or cherishes them. everyone runs and hides and turns off the lights to avoid them.
like the telemarketer past 5pm, to be regarded with nothing but distaste.
these are the worst feelings of all because as they transfer into you, there is a brief almost microscopic moment when you feel all the hollowness of generations of people who have experienced loss.
And that is why loss hurts so much, all at once, as it enters you. then it continues dully for a while, with bursts of trying to make itself understood.
But eventually, as all feelings do, it passes to another. And again you see the bright and beautiful hues of the world. It shall only return when it has some hope that you might just be able to stand it a little longer this time.
Always searching for where it belongs"